This question went through my mind more times than I can count when sitting in meetings with faculty and staff, or having a conversation with a parent. Time and time again, the frustration of not being able to help others see my perspective as head of school was difficult to hide. It took me a while and some hard-to-take feedback to finally realize that it wasn’t just me asking that question – everyone in the room was thinking the same about me: how can I make her understand?

It seems so obvious, but it is not obvious at all. That’s the reason why so many books and articles about leadership, emotional intelligence, and about having difficult conversations are piling up in all our inboxes, nightstands, and e-readers.

How do we focus on understanding others, who are our partners in the difficult discussions in school life?